Ohh,

What would I do without Ryan ?
I know he thinks I'm stupid, but he really does save my butt xD
Thanks, you help with everything, literally. Homework, school, friends, & whatshisface, haha. Thaaanks, you the best (;

Okay.

I GOT THIS, YEAH.


Rofl, that's how all my pep talks go.

I got inspired yesterday, & I'm MOTIVATED. I WILL make myself work for it. Every day, all day, I'll work towards it. I hope it pays off, cause I would really love to place this year in bolognini. It would make me so proud, knowing that I actually did something worthwhile, something that I worked so hard for.

Maybe MTNA this year ? (;
Hope you're ready for it, sharon. I'll try real hard, I promise.

I always tell myself,

Oh, I'll figure it out. And that doesn't happen half the time.

I've been blind.

Because it didn't occur to me until today how nice of a guy you are.
I always KNEW, but I never expected you would do all those things for me.

Thank you, for not leaving me. Thank you for not laughing at me,
Thank you for pushing me to finish, all the way to the end. Thank you, for staying with me, no matter how embarrassed you were. Thank you, for the encouragement. Thank you, for lending me your hoodie while it was cold outside. Thank you for being so sweet to me.
& most importantly, thank you for not giving up on me.
I'm sure everyone told you to, but you didn't. You're still giving me a chance.

Heey, I'm going after you, maan.

And with all those thank you's, I have to tell you a couple of sorry's, too.

I'm sorry that I am completely clueless at times. I'm sorry that I'm so shy. I'm sorry I can't be a better girl for you. I'm sorry that I pushed you away these past few weeks. I'm sorry for being clingy, I'm sorry for being jealous. I'm sorry for not trying harder. I'm sorry for not making the first move. I'm sorry for confusing you. And I'm sorry for making things way more complicated & difficult than they need to be. I'm sorry.

I wasn't lying when I said you meant a lot to me.

Naiyana's B-Day.

I wish he came. Too bad he was at work ]:
Maybe he'll come next time, naiyana.

HAHA, it was fun. Sitting, doing nothing. Then chasing some little kids outside after watching them beat up naiyana's car. Omg, kids these days.. The kid with the hat was COOL, though. Dang, MATURE. And afterwards, we came in & ate like pigs. LOL, lasagna. & trying to all fit on the couch, watching paranormal activity, and getting bored. Finally skipping to the end, and watching the lady throw the dead body at the camera -__- rofl, fun. Cutting cake, getting to know everyone, having naiyana steal all the blanket from me. Laying on the cold floor, cause she was being mean. xD Being cold in my shorts, finally wearing ashley's dress. Trying to do my hair for the occasion, LOL. Having Tofu growl at everyone, and attack Chris twice. Watching Jennifer & Denny cuddle, aw. & laura being too scared to go upstairs by herself, haha.

Thank you, for inviting me. It was fun.

TGIF.

really, thank goodness it's friday.

Turn-out.

Nope, I'll try. I promise, you can count on me. (:
" Well, I-- Um-- wait, what i mean is-- No, neverm-- Actually.."

That's EXACTLY what I sound like when I stutter. & I can't believe you actually understood what I was saying throughout the entire thing. I know for a fact that I didn't. Aghh, at least things are a lot better than they were last night.

Today had it's ups, it had it's downs. And all this talk of divorce is getting to me, because I couldn't even look at you the same way anymore. The thing that upsets me, is that I keep forgiving you when I shouldn't.
Asldkfjwoaieruasdf.

Oh, and Naiyana:
You better text me ASAP after you ask him. xD
Dang, I wish I could be there ! Don't be scared, you can do this.
I want pictures, HAHAHA. & i'm excited for your birthday party !
Happy 15th birthday, <3

Its not what you think.

Feels like my heart just dropped.
You misunderstood. How am I supposed to fix this ? It wasn't supposed to be like this.

Lately,

I haven't been able to sleep, at all.
I'll go to bed, and try to fall asleep, but I can't.
I wonder why that is ? Ugh, drives me crazy. Sometimes, I wish that it'll be time for school already, so I can wake up and stop trying to sleep, because I know I can't. & I'm trying not to take a nap. By the time I'm supposed to go to bed, I hope I'll be so exhausted that I'll just pass out. Too bad I already tried that, and it didn't work. Maybe, tonight will be different.

Tomorrow's my best friend's birthday !
HAHA, she got some exciting news (;
I know you can do it ! I'm rooting for you , gurl ;D
Yeeee, I'm so happy for you, haha.


Asdfqwej. I don't know what's happening.

it's alright,

If you don't have him, you'll still have me.

Wednesday.

Ew, I don't want to be an accompanist. I'm too lazy for that stuff, LOL.
Hm, I KNEW my name would be on the list xD Oh welll , it's alright as long as I get ready for Bolognini in time ! I got a month to prepare. I CAN DO IT, HAHA.

Well, I hope so.

I deleted the pictures, asldkfjqwer. I'm becoming more forgetful by the day, seriously.

lalalaaaaa ,

24/7, 365, you're the one I need,
Baby, when the calendar pages change (;

how,

annoying. you think I'm so stupid. & I was just trying to help. Kay, thanks.

threesome.

I missed all three of us being together.
It was a good day, once school ended (:

This is my fault.

I'm sorry.

homework, again.

Biology homework bites. And the sad thing is, I have the easiest teacher right now. Oh goodness, wait til I get Mr. Miller..
Ryan better help me study in that class, seriously.
I hope I get some sleep tonight. If I get done within the next hour, I'll get about 4 1/2 hours of sleep. HA, welcome to AMSAT -__-


Anyways, back to biology homework.

not looking forward to,

school tomorrow. My grades probably DROPPED. I'm pretty sure of that.
WHY, biology ? WHY, english ? WHY, chinese ? WHY, orchestra ?!
I'm so worried, this suuucks /;

Those classes aren't even that hard. What's wrong with me ?
ASFWAOIERUA;LSKJF AWRQWER. Please, PLEASE, let me have straight A's this semester.

Re-blog,

"I was right before. Let's be friends (;
I guess I had a lapse of judgement, but I got it figured out now.
Just hoping that I don't get confused again in the future"

I wish that was still true.

2010.

Hoping for the best, & staying optimistic ! ;D <3